Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Balloons and Ice Cream

I forget.
I do it often now.  Forget, I mean.  It's easy in this life that has taught me that the busier I am the happier I will be. No wait, the busier I am the more successful I will be. No wait, hell I cannot remember.  Either way, it encourages me to be busy and I forget.  Forget their names, to fill the water bottles, to feed them lunch. You name it, I forget it.  I blame no one but myself. After all, my absurd expectations of what I should accomplish in a day, in a week, come from no one else.  And therefore, I forget.  All of the time. Everyday.  

What has happened to us as mothers? Where in the hell did we go wrong?  Why is it that we have accepted the idea that the busier we are, the more activities they are in, the more things we volunteer for, are the things that will make them remember us.  You know what will make them remember us? Balloons.  Balloons and ice cream.  Yep.  You and I could spend ten minutes today and grab some balloons and a gallon of ice cream and they will remember it for the rest of their lives, guarantee it.  

You know what I remember about my mom?  An ice cream cake. It was a disaster,  But I remember her making it, and I remember her loving me enough to start over again and again until it was as close to right as it was ever going to get.  I remember spontaneous trips to the beach.  I remember her turning the eyes off on the stove and putting us in the car for Happy Meals (gross, I know but she didn't know any better and those boxes were really cool).  I do not remember a clean house, or meals that she made for every family at the church that needed one. I am not knocking taking meals, mind you, I am just stating fact.  

Busyness is a epidemic.  We are so busy when we have our kids with us, we cannot wait to get away from them!!  Now, a few of you are reading this and SWEAR that you NEVER want to be away from your kids.  Good for you, I am talking about the other 99% of the moms out there.  I am tired.  And I am going to be honest with you here, don't tell your friends this, but I do not do half of the things with my kids that most of you do.  We are not eaten up with activities and I do make mine entertain themselves.  I say no, often.  I do not take them everywhere,  I do not sign them up for every fun thing at the library and we skip birthday parties. Truth.  Still I am tired.  So the rest of you must be EXHAUSTED. 

You know what happens when you are tired and spent? You forget.  You forget that he really likes his sandwiches cut into triangles .     You forget that one sharp tone affects her for the rest of the day. You forget that his behavior is better when you aren't in a hurry.  You forget that she is 7.  Just 7.  JUST 7!!!!!!!   Sorry that was for me.  Even though you too may have a 7 year old that you treat as though he/she is 16.  If so, this one is for you........7!!!!!!!!!!

I want to be different. I want to be patient and fun and crazy and messy.  I want to play in the mud and build a fort and I want those freaking dishes to rot in the sink.  I want them to remember.  Remember that we went for ice cream after bed time. Remember that we bagged homework for a dance party.  Remember that I didn't give two shits what they were good at as long as they loved and lived and laughed and Jesus shone through their blue eyes.  And I want to remember too. Remember that she doesn't care if that skirt goes with that shirt and let her wear it.  Remember that she loves crafts and s'mores and that it is not her fault that I am late.  It is mine.  I want to remember that her eyes only sparkle when things are silly and her daddy is home.  And that for the love of God she is only 7!!!! 

I want to remember 7 and 6 and 2 1/2 even though it is hard and messy and louder than I would like on the days that I am spent.  I pray for that. I pray for friends that want to remember too.  I pray for friends that don't want to  compare notes or kids but would rather just sit and watch and enjoy what we have.  I miss friends like that and I am grateful for the few that I have.  I pray that you too will remember this year.  You will not hurry it by with homework and projects and 3 sports and church activities but instead, every now and then, you will just stop for balloons and ice cream.  

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