What does LOVE do?

Lately I have wanted to write.  But honestly, there are so many thoughts in my head that I have no idea where to start.  I am reading Bob Goff's book, "Love Does" and though it is inspiring, it is somewhat discouraging to me in a world that is full of death and violence and greed. I cannot write about politics because I am all over the map when it comes to how I feel and what I think. And if you aren't one sided, people claim that you are weak. Religion is out. If you love Jesus you're a hypocrite and if you don't you're a terrorist.  I am not really sure that one is worse than the other at this point in history. 

Our world is scary and our lives are full of unknowns.  Media lies to us all.  If you fall towards the right you are influenced by fear mongering propaganda, if you fall to the left it is the sympathy propaganda that influences your decisions.  Personally I am scared and sad at the same time, but again that is unacceptable to most. And then I read Bob's book and I am inspired. Not by Bob, well Bob is inspiring, but not JUST Bob.  I am inspired by my friends who just fostered a 5 week old little boy and those who give their time to food shelters this time of year.  I am inspired by the single moms and by the dads that are working two jobs. I am inspired by the families that bag Santa Claus and give their Christmas money to a family who can't eat this week without it. I am inspired because Bob is right Love Does.  Love does a lot of things every single day.  And while many of us are sitting around angry about what is happening in the world, we are missing out on DOING anything.  This is not to minimize what is happening all over the world.  Because all of it matters and all of it is important.  But it is to say what are you, what am I really DOING about it besides worrying, arguing, or complaining about it.  Probably nothing. 

But you know what we could be doing? Fostering, feeding, clothing, cooking, giving, loving, helping, employing, our friend, our neighbor, our brother.  Friends, we are wasting precious time.  Time that we have been given as a gift.  Time that is short, shorter than we realize.  I think most of us will get to end of our lives, be it today or ten years from now and think "I wish I had DONE more". I know I will. I already think that about my previous 40 years.  (Especially those wasted at my favorite watering hole in my 20's). Because if I have learned anything over the past ten years it is that life isn't about ME or my happiness or what I want or what I think is best for me.  Life is about love and passion and grace and mercy and the love of a God that gifts all of that to us unquestioned. It is about the souls of those people who do not know Him yet. And we are supposed to live that.  To live everyday showing that, shining that, caring about that, focusing on that..  I don't.  It is true.  And most people I know don't. 

Most people I know live for today; for this ball game or that dinner party with little or no regard to those  around them that may or may not know the Truth.  Most of them assuming that they themselves are "in the clear" when Jesus arrives and that God intends then for them to enjoy the rest of the time here on earth.  I pretty much disagree with all of that, but that is just me.  I don't remember anything in the bible talking about enjoying life or my happiness.  Not that I am a scholar. But what I do remember is that we are supposed to be spreading the Good word in this "getting darker everyday" world. We are supposed to care for the orphans and the widows. We are supposed to feed the hungry.  We are supposed to love our enemies and pray for those against us.  That is not to say I think we aren't supposed to protect ourselves and our families at the same time.  So I have started praying for my enemies.  I wasn't, I am now, but I wasn't.  I am praying, literally for the souls of all of those out to destroy this wonderful, beautiful, world that we live in.  I am praying for the souls of all of them.  Begging, pleading with Jesus to save them (and us) from their lost souls.  Praying is doing.  I want to be doing something even when it feels like I am helpless.  Will you pray with me?

Because Love prays and feeds and clothes and helps and DOES.  I want to DO something.  Today. I want to show my kids that today is not wasted. That we can make a difference.  We can shine our light in this community and it will matter.  I want to show them what the power of prayer DOES. What faith DOES. What grace DOES. What LOVE DOES. 

Balloons and Ice Cream

I forget.

I do it often now.  Forget, I mean.  It's easy in this life that has taught me that the busier I am the happier I will be. No wait, the busier I am the more successful I will be. No wait, hell I cannot remember.  Either way, it encourages me to be busy and I forget.  Forget their names, to fill the water bottles, to feed them lunch. You name it, I forget it.  I blame no one but myself. After all, my absurd expectations of what I should accomplish in a day, in a week, come from no one else.  And therefore, I forget.  All of the time. Everyday.  

What has happened to us as mothers? Where in the hell did we go wrong?  Why is it that we have accepted the idea that the busier we are, the more activities they are in, the more things we volunteer for, are the things that will make them remember us.  You know what will make them remember us? Balloons.  Balloons and ice cream.  Yep.  You and I could spend ten minutes today and grab some balloons and a gallon of ice cream and they will remember it for the rest of their lives, guarantee it.  

You know what I remember about my mom?  An ice cream cake. It was a disaster,  But I remember her making it, and I remember her loving me enough to start over again and again until it was as close to right as it was ever going to get.  I remember spontaneous trips to the beach.  I remember her turning the eyes off on the stove and putting us in the car for Happy Meals (gross, I know but she didn't know any better and those boxes were really cool).  I do not remember a clean house, or meals that she made for every family at the church that needed one. I am not knocking taking meals, mind you, I am just stating fact.  

Busyness is a epidemic.  We are so busy when we have our kids with us, we cannot wait to get away from them!!  Now, a few of you are reading this and SWEAR that you NEVER want to be away from your kids.  Good for you, I am talking about the other 99% of the moms out there.  I am tired.  And I am going to be honest with you here, don't tell your friends this, but I do not do half of the things with my kids that most of you do.  We are not eaten up with activities and I do make mine entertain themselves.  I say no, often.  I do not take them everywhere,  I do not sign them up for every fun thing at the library and we skip birthday parties. Truth.  Still I am tired.  So the rest of you must be EXHAUSTED. 

You know what happens when you are tired and spent? You forget.  You forget that he really likes his sandwiches cut into triangles .     You forget that one sharp tone affects her for the rest of the day. You forget that his behavior is better when you aren't in a hurry.  You forget that she is 7.  Just 7.  JUST 7!!!!!!!   Sorry that was for me.  Even though you too may have a 7 year old that you treat as though he/she is 16.  If so, this one is for you........7!!!!!!!!!!

I want to be different. I want to be patient and fun and crazy and messy.  I want to play in the mud and build a fort and I want those freaking dishes to rot in the sink.  I want them to remember.  Remember that we went for ice cream after bed time. Remember that we bagged homework for a dance party.  Remember that I didn't give two shits what they were good at as long as they loved and lived and laughed and Jesus shone through their blue eyes.  And I want to remember too. Remember that she doesn't care if that skirt goes with that shirt and let her wear it.  Remember that she loves crafts and s'mores and that it is not her fault that I am late.  It is mine.  I want to remember that her eyes only sparkle when things are silly and her daddy is home.  And that for the love of God she is only 7!!!! 

I want to remember 7 and 6 and 2 1/2 even though it is hard and messy and louder than I would like on the days that I am spent.  I pray for that. I pray for friends that want to remember too.  I pray for friends that don't want to  compare notes or kids but would rather just sit and watch and enjoy what we have.  I miss friends like that and I am grateful for the few that I have.  I pray that you too will remember this year.  You will not hurry it by with homework and projects and 3 sports and church activities but instead, every now and then, you will just stop for balloons and ice cream.