Monday, January 2, 2012

Happy New Year 2012

Happy New Year my friends!!  2011 went by so quickly that I fear I missed a lot more than I wanted too.  As I sit and reflect on the year behind me, I realize how much I was taught by you and by Him.  I smile at the lessons that I learned, at the hurdles that I jumped, at the moments that I treasure. 

2011 taught me patience.  It taught me how to love myself more than I did in 2010. It taught me that my idea of failure is not the same as my husbands or my Saviours.  2011 taught me that there are some friends that never go away, never quit, never fail me.  It taught me that being a mother is more important than bed time and eating right.  It taught me that loving someone unconditionally is one of the most important things that I can ever do.  2011 showed me that I am tougher than I thought.  That I am weaker than I ever imagined.  That even though I classify myself as independent, I am not.  It showed me how much I need my mom.  It reminded me why I married my husband.  It humbled me at the right times and sometimes, many times, it kicked me when I was down.  There were moments when I quit.  Moments that I am ashamed to remember because I failed as a mom, or a wife, or a daughter, or a friend.  But then there were moments that I succeeded beyond my imagination. Moments where I watched someone I love make a change, find hope, and move forward while God used me to encourage them.  I saw miracles and deaths, loss and love.  2011 showed me that some of the people I love most are stronger than I gave them credit for.  I was encouraged many times by the people closest to me as I watched them succeed and overcome at different points in their lives.  I was blessed by new friendships, and inspired by old ones.  I was reminded that I come from a family of the biggest hearts Jesus ever made.  That I have a mom like no other mom in the world.  That my dad loves us all more than we realize.  That my sister misses me as much as I miss her.  That my brother loves me just as much as he did ten years ago. 

I have a list of resolutions.  Some attainable, some probably unrealistic.  But don't we all?  Sure I would like to get back in shape.  I would like to eat less and run more.  I want to read the bible, the whole thing.  I want to learn to be content in TN rather than spending my time wishing away the weeks and months until I go home again.  I want to be a better wife.  A better mother. A better friend.  A better student of life.  I want to cry less and laugh more.  I want to enjoy everyday with my kids, even the hard ones.  And yes, I want to have one more little person to carry and love and raise.  That one is not up to me entirely.  I realize that.  But it is on the list.  I am grateful for 2012.  For every breath that I get to take today and tomorrow.  Grateful for these girls and this man that holds my home and my heart together.  Grateful for my favorites, you know who you are.  But more than any of this, I am grateful for a Saviour that allows me to have all of the things I love the most.  Happy New Year my friends.  I pray you are blessed beyond measure!!


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